In the lives of Indian men and women, no event is as important as their marriage. It marks a step and transition from childhood to adult life. In the Hindu tradition, marriage is a sacred union and neither man nor woman is considered complete without it. In fact, the Hindu scriptures say from the very beginning: “One is incomplete and considered profane if he does not marry.”
Dowry vs. Girlfriend
But sadly, even in modern times, Indian society is constantly threatened by social problems that endanger the well-being of individuals and the overall growth and progress of the society as a whole. One of these social themes is the marriage transaction (dowry), or the giving of material gifts or cash during weddings. The participants, mostly from the groom, do not hesitate to reject the marriage donation proposal for not agreeing to the payment of this dowry. These transfers, made at the time of marriage between the families involved, are characteristic of the Indian subcontinent. These exchanges of money or goods can go both ways: from the bride’s family to the groom’s or vice versa. A dowry is what the bride’s family gives to the groom’s family, while the bride price is the name of the money and material gifts that the groom gives to the bride. Although the bride-to-be practice, where the groom’s family pays for the bride’s, is practiced in most cultures of marriage transactions, the gift of dowry is more common in India, meaning that the bride’s family bride must pay the groom’s.
This type of “gift-giving” is a hot topic in India due to its negative effects and ramifications on women. For example, some believe that sons are more desirable than daughters because they bring wealth to the family at the time of marriage, while daughters take it away.
The history of dowry in India
Dowry or Dahej is the payment in cash or in kind by the bride’s family to the groom’s family along with the giving of the bride (called Kanyadaan) in Indian marriage. Kanyadaan, or ‘gift from a virgin daughter’ is an essential part of Hindu marriage rites.
In the past, in most South Indian societies, this transfer passed from the family of the groom to the family of the bride. Malayali marriage sites and even some Telugu marriage sites will have profiles of grooms who are willing to pay a dowry to get married. Most of these marriage sites elaborate on the bride price custom and mention that this tradition was followed by high caste Brahmins. On the other hand, in North India, dowry, rather than bride price, has been the dominant tradition.
Himachal Pradesh: The Dhari
Any form of financial marriage transaction is potentially akin to opening a can of worms and a Pandora’s box. There is a practice in the state of Himachal Pradesh in northern India that makes women feel respected. And that is the practice of reverse dowry or payment of bride price, also known as dhari. This practice is particularly popular in parts of Shimla and in the picturesque town of Sirmaur in Himachali.
Each Himachali community has its peculiar set of rituals, traditions, customs and rites, which are kept and practiced with great enthusiasm. The customs followed by these Himalayans are somewhat different from those followed by their compatriots living on the plains.
Although the sum of money is supposedly given by the groom to cover the marital expenses, it must be considered that there are some factors that determine how much money will be paid. Reverse dowry is positively associated with the age of the bride at the time of marriage, meaning that an older bride will command a higher bride price, unlike the rest of India.
The number of sisters a boyfriend has is positively and significantly related to reverse dowry. It is difficult to explain this relationship even though the relationship is persistent. Marriage migration distance is not a significant variable affecting bride price, nor is caste.
dowry in culture
Sociologists believe that the origins of dowry lie in the practice followed by upper caste families giving wedding gifts to the bride of their family. Later, the dowry, usually in cash, was given to the bride, groom, or groom’s family to help with household or personal expenses and became a form of insurance in case the bride’s in-laws mistreated her. . Although dowry was legally prohibited in India in 1961, it remains popular and appears to have become an institutionalized practice.