Whether you’re flipping through a magazine or browsing the internet or TV, you’ll probably see the queen of tidying, Marie Kondo, sharing her tips for tidying up with her KonMari method. Often our thoughts could use a bit of order, and specifically our beliefs. Some of our thoughts and beliefs can be limiting. What is a limiting belief? A limiting belief is a thought that we hold to be true about ourselves, others, or the world that limits us in some way.
Our beliefs have been formed over many years and are influenced by input from our family, our teachers, and our friends. We have believed these things for so long that they seem like fact and we have come to see our world through that filter. Limiting beliefs can trigger the body’s fear response unnecessarily and trigger feelings like rejection, abandonment, or inadequacy. Although his survival is not at stake, his body’s defenses act as if he is in danger. Cortisol levels rise and blood flow drains from the prefrontal cortex into the arms and legs, preparing them for flight. Thought goes out the window.
Limiting beliefs are often unconscious, but once these negative beliefs get into our heads, we begin to form patterns of behavior around them that reinforce them. For example, maybe you were fired from his job and you have a belief that he will not get a job with the same salary as he did in his last position. What can happen as a result of that belief? You can rely solely on job boards instead of networking or “spraying and praying” your resume, applying for anything and everything, hoping something will stick. Beliefs drive our behavior and create our results.
If you suspect that you have some beliefs that may be limiting you in some way, answering the following questions created by life coach Kain Ramsay may help you discover them.
1. What is a problem or limitation that has held you back for a while?
2. What would you like to do/have, except something prevents you from getting/doing it?
3. What is really stopping you from getting what you want?
4. This is a problem why?
5. And this means? (Repeat as many times as necessary)
6. What must you believe makes this problem exist?
7. What do you believe about YOURSELF that has made this a problem?
8. What do you think about the WORLD that has made this a problem?
9. What is this problem an example of?
10… and what is this an example of?
11. When did you decide your problem was a problem (approximately)?
12. At what point in your life did you purchase this concept?
13. What decision did you make that gave birth to this problem?
14. What does this problem mean to you?
15. What will life be like when you don’t have this problem?
What limiting beliefs did you discover? What limiting beliefs do you want to discard? The late great Dr. Wayne Dyer coined the phrase with the book of the same title, “Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life.”